“Not every child has an equal talent or an equal ability or equal motivation, but they should have the equal right to develop their talent and their ability and their motivation, to make something of themselves.”
- John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)
After Amniocentesis, the most talked about test in India is ACTN3 test or Sports gene test. In India, it was launched by Super Religare Laboratories in March ’11. This test has garnered lots of controversy from its very inception. Now, parents are least bothered whether it’s a girl or boy but if it’s an athlete or non athlete. When I read about this test in a leading newspaper, I was shocked to know that now a strand of DNA will determine the future of so many kids. Parents with positive results were very happy as if they have hit a jackpot and on the other hand parents with negative results were bankrupt.
Parents should understand that each child is unique and have their own qualities. With some tests, we cannot determine the future of kids. Kids should be allowed to take decisions themselves. Parents should avoid spoon feeding their kids and should make them self reliant. Each kid has different likes and dislikes, some are morning persons and some sleeps late at night; some throws tantrums and some are very reserved. Every child is different and needs a different style of parenting.
DNA is unique for each and every person. No two DNA matches with each other, then drawing out a comparison among two kids is baseless because both share different strands of DNA. No matter how much we train our kids to become what we want, we cannot change their natural tendencies and characteristics. We, as parents, should accept them for who they are.
Parents tend to blame their parenting style for their kid’s failure. None of the parenting styles is perfect. In the movie, ‘Taare Zameen Par’, father used to curse his son for not getting good at studies and used to blame his wife’s style of parenting. But, he never tried to find out the reason behind his kid’s failure. This movie was based on ‘Dyslexia’, a learning disability that impairs a person's fluency or comprehension accuracy in being able to read. It prompted many parents to visit psychologists to see if their kids are suffering from the same disability. Many parents realized that there are many uncontrollable factors which can affect their kids’ development and they should change their parenting style to suit their kids’ requirements.
Each child is good at something. Parents need to identify their talent and should learn to appreciate it. Constant comparison with siblings or friends might make kids feel depressed and undeserving. It can affect their self confidence as well. Parents should have faith in their kids. They should not impose too many restrictions and put burden of expectations on them.
Parents should understand their kids and should respect their decisions. They need to change their parenting style as per their kids’ requirements and should not be influenced by others’ parenting method. Certain tests cannot decide the future of a kid but good parenting and understanding can prepare a kid for a bright future.
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